Not Just Bragging About Him Bringing Doughnuts, Also A piece of my husband’s heart!!

(Plus a Lil about him/his story)

***”He more than likely will never know what I talk bout on here. I’ve showed him pics & things I’ve said. I’ll let you know when I know!”***💯

He bought doughnuts for the whole morning crew!!!!! That’s something he hasn’t voluntarily ever done. Spending money on surprises. Especially for a whole fast food joint. But as you can probably guess they were completely devoured them. It was nice to see him be generous without being actually asked first. A huge piece of him died towards the end of 2010-2011. He lost his only daughter to an accidental overdose. She vomited and it went into her lungs and basically drowned on it. She lived 6 days on life support before they had to pull the plug. He’s never been the same since. 6 months before her death he lost his father to a heart attack. it was like BAM! BAM! One loss after another. And it wasn’t distant family either so his pain and grief were right there in the home of his heart. I wasn’t even there. We had gotten into a pretty bad argument and I took the advice of his daughter and decided to go to my Uncle’s house in Chicago. Hell, he was footing the bill for the plane ticket, so why the hell not. But she was right though. We were up each other’s butt all the time cause I wasn’t working at the time (he didn’t want me to) and neither was he. She happened to call him during the aftermath of the argument and told me it would be good for both of us to have some time apart, since we were always with and around each other. So I took her advice because after all she was right, right?

I feel like if I didn’t leave then she’d still be here. Just a week before her overdose, she came by to check on him. Only to find him laying in the floor holding his stomach. He was rushed to the ER and then to emergancy surgery for his appendix to be taken out. He was at his daughter’s house (his before his divorce) recovering from the surgery when it happened to her. He was laying on the couch when his son-in-law came down the hall to the living room to tell him that something was wrong with her and he couldn’t get her to wake up. When he rushed back there he picked her up and held her to his chest where more of her vomity came out of her mouth onto his shirt. He didn’t care because this is his child. His babygirl. He was freaking out on the inside, and told her husband, very calmly, to call 911. She was rushed to the hospital, but as you know when a person asphyxiat’s, it goes back into their lungs and drowns them just as water would. Except in this case your food that was previously eaten, also goes into your lungs. He was crushed and his heart was broken beyond repair.

My son and I were just fixing to eat something I think. My son had a feeling to check up on dad for an unknown reason. Then he walked over to me and showed me his cell phone with a text message from his dad saying that his daughter was in the hospital dying. When I read the message my heart sank. I taught my husband how to text because he never knew how. So I instantly thought he just messed up and he meant his ex wife, not his daughter. As you can imagine I was nervous and I really didn’t know what to say when I called him to check. He said, “No you read it right”. I of course asked what in the hell happened, and if they were gonna be able to save her. He was just as clueless in that moment as he was in his answer. It was only then, I knew I HAD to go back. I had an upcoming court date anyways for some trouble I had got into. My son and I planned on how to tell my uncle what was going on and that we really needed to go back early. I had him enrolled in school already and everything. I left to come back home and my son stayed there because of school, and I did’t really know what was gonna happen between me and himn when I did get back. I just knew in that moment that he needed me immediately.

Road trip set and planned, we headed out. It was the longest ride I think in my life. Knowing what I would be facing upon returning home on top of looking at some extended jail time! It was just a “FUBAR” moment in both our lives. We met him at a gas station a few exits away from his house. When he got out of his truck and I first laid eyes on him, I was at a loos for words. I swear he lost 40 lbs in just the month I was gone! I had no no idea what this say to him, it even hotter tho comfort him. Obviously saying “It’s gonna be okay” was never gonna be good enough to heal this situation. I was just in shock! How could this thing’s have gone so freaking bad in less than one months time? I still say to this day that if I’d have never left she’d be alive today. That’s untrue now and I know that. Even if I’d have been home, she’d have been at her home and shit still would have happened. Only he wouldn’t have been there to pick his unconscious daughter up off her bed and try and bring her into consciousness. When he told me how her husband had came to tell him, it seemed to me he had no urgency in the situation. Like he maybe wasn’t sure what was wrong with her maybe. Personally though, to me, after hearing people repeat his actions, or should I say lack there of, made me think he did it purposely. The doctor kept pulling my husband off to the side informing him or all of what she had in her system that caused this to happen. Just that act alone set his daughters husband off. Almost like he didn’t want her own father to know the cause of her condition, and how she got to be the way she was at that moment. She wasn’t in love with him and had told her mama as much just weeks, if not days before this happened. She was planning on leaving him/divorcing him. He couldn’t keep a job for shit. He’d put his hands on her once before. Don’t worry my husband instilled the fear of God in that boy the day that went down. I, myself, think he found out about her wanting to leave him and did that to her so she couldn’t take their daughter away from him. Look I know that seems to be stretching it. However if you ever had the chance to watch a rerun of the events that unfolded that evening, then you’d see exactly what I was talking about. You’d see and get to know the shady kind of character he really was. When he came down the hallway to get her dad the night it happened, he was in no hurry about getting her help. Anyone else would have ran down the hallway to get someone’s attention or hell, even screamed from the bedroom. He, however did none of those. During the viewing at the funeral she was dressed in something she never would have worn if she were alive. Plus her husband had no make-up put on her. She wasn’t the same girl that everyone knew and loved. He also didn’t not only “NOT FREAK OUT”. He never shed one little tear over her passing. As soon as she was buried he took his daughter and moved home to his parent’s house and raised my husband’s granddaughter away from this little city we live in. He had to fight or argue to see her. Or when she went to his son’s house then my husband would go there and visit her. To this day she looks exactly like her mama did when she was her age. I do probably sound like I have an ax to grind with this “BOY” who happen to wed his daughter and give him the granddaughter he has this day. Honestly I really do. I remember a phone conversation with him once many years ago where he had threatened to file charges on me for “Defamation of Character”, because I was saying I think he was responsible for her death. She wasn’t an addict. She did take a pain pill here and there when she would get migraine headaches, and maybe even a Valium for anxiety here and there. That was it though. Her mother nor her father have ever seen her in a state of stupor where she completely was nodded out not aware of her surroundings. She was always bright eyed and bushy tailed every time I ever saw her. So for her to have all the drugs the doctors were saying she had in her system, baffled even me. If her husband was so madly in love with her why did he not cry or even freak out just a little bit while all of this was going on? Questions everyone has that only he knows all the answers to. As I said it could very well just be this over active imagination I have along with my habit of over thinking that leads me to believe these things about him. It was just so convenient for him is all I’m saying.

With all that being said I’m going to close this subject once and for all. Lay it to rest with all the beautiful memories I have of her and everyone that loved her has. I could really use some feed back on why my feeling of his involvement is so strong, even after all these years have passed.

By tallgirl07

I have always loved expressing myself through words. I have been a bookworm since I started reading I think. So expressing myself through writing has forever been super easy for me. Now if I could just teach everyone who didn't know how, how to read, then they'd be able to read all the fascinating literature out there. I'd go crazy if I couldn't curl up to a good book on a rainy day if I wanted to. I work with the public. So I was outside a couple days ago typing away on my 2nd hand chrome book, and a nice gentleman started conversation about how long it took to charge. I said not long for an older model. He said he knew, about the older model I was working with. I proceeded to tell him I was trying my hand at writing a book. He turned out to be an avid bookworm himself. He gave me nothing but encouragement to finish the book. I like to tell myself I can do anything. But we all know how some people should just stick to their profession, well I'm gonna keep trying. I won't stop until I know without a shadow of doubt I can't succeed. Then maybe I'll put my pencil down, or in my case now, close my chrome book for good. Something tells me I won't have to just yet though.

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