Another Waking Morning of being mentally frustrated!

I was all dead set about having that conversation with my son yesterday. But I took my husband’s advice and decided not to have that conversation. Instead he wanted me to enjoy the day and bask in the joy and limelight of getting a 15 cent raise. I worked super hard to prove myself and what I was for real capable of doing. I knew I was a damn good worker. I wasn’t about to let that one mess up, (my relapse), make my boss or the crew I work with think that’s who I really am. I mean I am and always will be an addict. Maybe an addict in recovery still/always, what does it matter if I was truly sorry and I have made up for it and then some. During the morning shift yesterday while I was doing dishes my boss was walking by and she told me to remind her to talk to me later. I was questioning what it could possibly be and if I were in trouble for something. So when I asked her she said again to remind her later. Well if you know me any by reading things I post I couldn’t leave it alone. It was eating at me. I walked yup to her and asked, “Was it about something I was supposed to do but didn’t?” She nodded her head yes. I then automatically knew what it was about and so I began to explain myself. It was because I had left some dishes unwashed, after my shift, in the sink when I clocked out to go home. I told her that I personally talked to the BOY who bitched about it for almost 5 minutes before I even left that day, and I apologized profusely about it. Telling him it was only the 2nd time I’ve done it and I have worked there almost a year. Guess that explanation wasn’t good enough for him, even though he acted like it was okay while talking to him. He told me that nobody liked him that he worked with. Now I know why. The day he just had to bitch about about a few measly dishes, is also the same day I was the only sandwich maker that worked back line that afternoon. We were busy as hell and I was by myself with nobody working back there with me. So Mrs. P, our biscuit maker, usually never takes up for anyone she says, but she took up for me when she heard that. She knew and remembered that day even better than I did. I had forgot I was working alone back there that day. I usually have a 3 pm person working with me into the afternoon. However that day I didn’t. I swear I really like my job. Hell I even love it most days. It’s my escape from being trapped at home. I do tire easily though. More now than ever before. I’m almost 40 yrs old and I’m not exactly a spring chicken anymore. A lot of you that just probably read that are older than me I know and are like, ugh, ONLY almost 40? I get it. In my defense though, I have been working since I was of legal age to do so. I have lifted many heavy things that have taken a toll on my back, and have caused it to have a lot of problems. I take ibuprofen every morning though. So that way it’ll kick in and help before my back really starts hurting. And it will too. Early into my shift. It’s always usually the lower right hand side that I have problems with. It’s coming up on that time for me to have to leave and go the the labor shack. Make this money to pay these bills. Don’t worry though. Tina will be writing more come my 30 minute break. Have a good morning you guys. Be blessed

By tallgirl07

I have always loved expressing myself through words. I have been a bookworm since I started reading I think. So expressing myself through writing has forever been super easy for me. Now if I could just teach everyone who didn't know how, how to read, then they'd be able to read all the fascinating literature out there. I'd go crazy if I couldn't curl up to a good book on a rainy day if I wanted to. I work with the public. So I was outside a couple days ago typing away on my 2nd hand chrome book, and a nice gentleman started conversation about how long it took to charge. I said not long for an older model. He said he knew, about the older model I was working with. I proceeded to tell him I was trying my hand at writing a book. He turned out to be an avid bookworm himself. He gave me nothing but encouragement to finish the book. I like to tell myself I can do anything. But we all know how some people should just stick to their profession, well I'm gonna keep trying. I won't stop until I know without a shadow of doubt I can't succeed. Then maybe I'll put my pencil down, or in my case now, close my chrome book for good. Something tells me I won't have to just yet though.

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